Who Likes Confrontation?

I don’t like confrontation and I am sure you didn’t read this title and raise your hand either.

Confrontation brings to mind heated words, fear of a fight and other not-so-pleasant pictures. I was recently “confronted” by a neighbor I don’t even know. I haven’t met her and I didn’t see her when she just yelled from somewhere behind a bush to tell me what was on her mind. I’ve been in a battle with my flesh ever since. What do I do? Do I respond, and how will I respond?

Right now I know that any response will not be fruitful. You see my heart is not in a place to do all things as unto Christ. My heart is not lined up with “WWJD”. What is in my heart really doesn’t need to spring out of my mouth. What would come from my lips is not what the Bible would call speaking the truth in love.

If I do need to say anything at all I really need to get my heart right first.

I need to pray. I need the love of Christ. I need His wisdom. I need to know if I am to say anything. I need to know if I just need to remain silent.

I also know my heart is not the only one in this. The heart of the other person is involved. So whichever end of “confrontation” we may be on, we have a heart issue. Can you and I truly speak truth in love with the right motives? Can we receive words from others and really examine our own hearts and hear the truth?

As I examine this situation I recognize that although my neighbor wasn’t nice about how she said what she said, it was true. I have had to correct the wrong in this case and need to know what the next step would be. Scripture would back up heaping hot coals of kindness on her. Scripture also shows me Jesus’ wisdom in keeping quiet, too. I need His voice to let me know what the next step is.

Today you will need to use your words. How will you use them? Will they pour out from your flesh? Will they be coming from a right and pure motive? Today others will be using their words. Are you willing to listen and not just hear? Are you willing to look for truth in those words even if they sting at first? Are you willing to seek out a godly resolution to the situation words bring about?

Let your speech always be with grace, seasoned with salt, that you may know how you ought to answer each one. Colossians 4:6


Kathy Withers is on staff at America’s Keswick in the Development Department. Kathy has been married to her husband Dave for 28 years. They have two adult children. Kathy is active in her local Church and has taught Sunday school and Bible studies for women. Her passion is to encourage women to deepen their walk with Jesus Christ by finding and living out the truths of God’s Word.

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